I have been home for 2 weeks now. Lots of great times with friends and family. I am blessed to have these awesome people in my life. I have missed out on a lot of memories and milestones in their lives while I've been away. But my heart still longs to be in Uganda. I miss the kids and facebook chat is just not cutting it. I have also spent some money on phone cards and it would be easy to use them in one day. I receive SMSs from friends over there and they don't understand that I have to pay to send and receive. (They only pay to send.) So my mouth will probably drop when my brother tells me what my cell phone bill is next month, but I am glad that they remember me. The other day I called my brothers in Ntinda and I heard a lot of noise in the background. I asked where they were and they said that they were at home. I quickly perked up and was like, "Are my kids outside playing?!" James yelled out, "Mzungu Jo says hello." It was great to hear them yelling "Mzungu, mzungu!!" once again. They melt my heart.

So of course people keep asking me what I am doing here. Well, here's the story. I have narrowed it down to three options. #3 Find a job here.  #2 Find a job in Uganda  #3 A millionaire (or several people with a heart and a desire to give) step forward willing to support me for the long term so that I can do what I am passionate about in Uganda. So yea, that's where I am.

Please keep me in your prayers as I go through this transitional period.

So it's about time that I update you all here. I am back in good old Lancaster County. And no it's not because Ugandans are all money hungry jerks. Yes, the last straw for me may have been that there was ONE Ugandan who was a money hungry jerk. He is one of my brothers that I lived with and I believe that he misused some money and needed money fast to cover up his mistake. He said some REALLY horrible things about my family and friends who spent their life savings to come and visit me and has yet to apologize to this day.  He also demanded that they pay him $350 and locked my bedroom door and kicked me out of the house.  His friends watched in shock and my fan club was already at the guesthouse down the road. God works in mysterious ways that always work for the good.  I am understanding that we make mistakes sometimes because we act quickly or say things out of anger. My hope and prayer is that this young man grows the balls to apologize to me, his sister. Not so much for my own personal well being, but for his own. My last week in the house he refused to speak at me and only occasionally waved as we passed on the road.
So my last week was a whirlwind of emotions and goodbyes.  I can stand and say that I was not emotionally stable before this episode, so after it I was a hot mess. I have never cried so often in my life. Every time I told the story that I was leaving to my Ugandan brothers and friends, I lost it. I am thankful for James who was always there to listen and was willing to give up his life the last week to travel everywhere with me so that I did not have to be alone. For Charles and Ben who stood by my side and I think that their hearts broke for me. For Collins, a family friend, who after I made my decision to leave and was crying hysterically in the house, when I ran outside...he followed. For my REAL brothers and Abby and Kelly who spent their last 24 hours in Uganda comforting me and helping me get things packed. For my friend Abbey who offered that I move into his place...not that this was helpful since I already made the decision to go home and was trying to be firm. But I am thankful!! And God already showed his perfect plan in the entebbe (Uganda) airport. A girl came up to me and asked if we could talk.She was in Uganda for a week (supposed to stay for 4 months to study) but her malaria drugs interfered and dug up some anxiety issues that she battled in the past.  She was completely unstable and nervous about flying home alone. We quickly discovered that we were on the same flight and our layovers in Qatar were both 8 hours. So I will hang out here in Lancaster until God calls me back. More to come as I reflect on my 8 months in Uganda to come...

Christmas 2011- Father's Divine Love Ministries Jinja, Uganda

Happy New Year!!!....in a few short hours

So I am getting ready to say good bye to 2011 and HELLO 2012!! I am not sure of my wild and crazy plans this evening and there is no electricity at home so....   But 2011 was full of many great adventures, opportunities, and firsts for and I am sure 2012 will bring the same. For one, 2012 will be the first year with no pork and saurkraut and mashed potatoes. :(  Though no fear of bad luck... I am going to make the best substitute. Pork with cabbage that has sweet and sour sauce and irish, maybe will even mash them.
In 11 days now (but who's counting) my brothers and friends, Kelly and Abby will be arriving in Uganda!!! I am so excited to experience Uganda with them. We have lots of plans of traveling all over the country, enjoying fellowship time, playing with some awesome kids, and living the African life. I will be sure to post some stories here so that you can all know what you are missing out on. I am so thankful that I have such awesome family and friends who are willing to spend their life savings to come visit me. I owe them BIG time!! Thank you Dustin, Michael, Kelly, and Abby!

It's Christmas time in Africa!!

This holiday season has been well.....weird! I miss all the Christmas hoopla and traditions back home with family and friends. I miss the Christmas tree, the baking, gingerbread houses with the McGaw's (Shoutout!), the shopping, the cold weather, the party's, the extra functions at work that is great money, and the Christmas music and lights everywhere all of the time. But at the exact same time I really am enjoying the sunshine (I have a nice burn and peeling skin), and the easy-easy life (okay I did breakdown and I must admit thus far I colored 2 sesame street christmas pics and I made a red and green paper chain for the sitting room at home).  I can probably count on my 2 hands the number of Christmas songs that I have heard thus far. This morning at church the children did their Christmas production and it was WONDERFUL. I am really looking forward to the Christmas Cantata next week. But most of all I am enjoying the true simplicity of Christmas this year. I sometimes forget that Christmas is right around the corner...2 weeks to be exact!!! I don't have my Christmas plans set in stone yet, but I know this holiday will be one that I will never forget!! (And maybe my parents will even allow my stocking to hang until I get home...) Love you and miss you all!! And I hope that you all have a wonderful Christmas season!! There is still time for you to give your hard earned money to an orphan as well! Please do so!! MERRY CHRISTMAS!!!!

Coffee House THIS SATURDAY!!

Coffee House to benefit Uganda Orphanage
THIS Saturday, December 3rd 6-9:30pm

Pequea BIC Church - 40 Church Rd. Lancaster (right off Penn Grant Rd)

Come out enjoy some local musicians, sip a hot cup of coffee, indulge in delicious baked items, and enjoy each others company! It's bound to be a great time!! And it's for an awesome cause. So I want you all to clear your calendars and BE THERE!! I don't want to hear any excuses.

All proceeds go directly to Father's Divine Love Ministries here in Uganda. The money will be used to pay for food, medical, and school tuition fees. The very basic needs of these children MUST be met! Help us, help them!


If you are unable to come out (for some stupid reason), but would be willing to bake something, you can call my brother Dustin at 519-7999. Thanks!!

You can educate and feed a Ugandan Orphan from the comfort of your home!!

Dear friends and family,
Oli otya! I send you greetings from Uganda. It's hard to beleive that I have been here for 5.5 months already.  I can guarentee you that I am a changed person because of this experience. I am now not surprised to see people in public urinating or picking their nose.  I expect to be charged the "mzungu price", I expect to see people throwing their trash wherever they please, and for every boda man to ask me, "we go?". Haha! On a more serious note, I expect to see people give all that they have, for complete strangers to invite me into their home for tea and to socialize (though we speak a different language), for children to over thank me for buying them bread or fruit, and for people I meet in taxis to start up a conversation as we are stuck in the jam and to be genuinely thankful for what little I am doing.
I am so grateful for each and every one of you who has blessed me in so many ways. Without all of your thoughts, prayers, and well wishes- I know without a doubt that I would have given up  months ago.
As you are all aware the holiday season is quickly approaching. As the popular song asks, "Do they know it's Christmas time at all?", the answer is YES. Many (actually every) ngo that I have been working alongside are feeling the pain in their finances as the world economy is hurting. Children's homes are unable to feed their children- kids are going to school hungry (that's if they are lucky enough that someone was willing to pay their school fees). They are so in debt to food suppliers, medical caregivers, and schools, that eventually the tabs are going to be put to an abrupt halt and innocent children are going to suffer.
But YOU (yes you) can make a difference. It costs approximately $1.50 to feed a children three, hot, basic meals per day. I know that the vast majority of you have $1.50 in your pocket at the end of every day. Ugandans will hustle all day to get that money and then turn around and give it to a friend in the hospital or give it away to a person needing transport.
I have lived my whole life valuing saving money- to see how large I could get my savings account. I even have money in stocks, cd's, etc. Then there are people in Uganda MY AGE who can not find a job and so they hustle EVERYDAY and when they come home with $2 they buy dinner for everyone in their house. If they have been blessed with $8 that day, and they so happen to get a phone call from an orphanage who can't feed their kids dinner that night, they give $8. And when that orphanage calls me I ask 150 questions, who, what, where, and how. I have seen it all. And every time I think WOW!
The world has so much to learn from Ugandans. The people here have a desire to take care of one another to the point that it hurts. I am not asking you to necessarily give until it hurts (because I am not able to give that way. But, hey, wouldn't it be cool if we did sometimes.) I just ask that you give from the overflow.
All contributions will be given to orphanages to pay off debt that they have accumulated to make sure that their children's basic needs have been being met. I know most of your Christmas trees will be crowded with things that you don't really need. Why not consider giving the gift of education or a few hot meals to a child whose parents are deceased and others whose parents chose to not want their children. If we all give a little, we can change the future of Uganda by impacting her future leaders today.
All contributions can be made payable to me "Jolene Goss" and mailed to 8 Campside Circle Conestoga, Pa 17516. Or see that either of my parents or brothers receive the contributions. Thank you once again!!

So I have not updated this thing in FOREVER!...I know. I have been thinking the past couple of days about what I could write about and I still have nothing, but don't fret I am going to write anyways. Life has been kind of slow here with not much exciting happening. But this weekend I am traveling to Rwanda with a good friend of mine, Abbey. He has family there and has not seen them for some time and I need to escape Uganda in order to be able to stay. So we are a perfect traveling pair. We will be staying with his family and friends and living the local life. I am excited about this.
I have been sick a lot recently. Two days of some stomach virus/food illness followed by a week of a bad cold with some other things mixed in there. I still have a small throat tickle cough, but it is so much better than it was and I can actually get some sleep at nights.
Life at home is good. Everyone is always busy and nobody is ever really around except to sleep. The past couple weeks some of them have been taking a day to hang out with me which has been nice. I love these guys so much, though they make me mad at times. But, hey! that's what brothers do. Last week Ronnie's younger brother came to stay for the week while he was on holiday. He's like 12 years old, great kid. We enjoyed hanging out, watching movies, cooking for each other, eating hamburgers and chips. I loved when I left for some time and came back and he came out of the house with a big smile to greet me and welcome me home. I now have internet on my phone thanks to him (that means fb too!!)  and some more movies downloaded onto ronnie's laptop that I can take to my room and watch. What a genius!!
Bula I guess is good. I sent them an sms today saying that I was coming and they responded that today was not a good day. WEIRD!! But that gave me some time to catch up on some other things. I will head over there some evening this week They have been struggling to collect enough money to feed the children which makes me worry since all of the children will soon be on holiday. Please pray that funds do come through for them. However last week when I was over someone had donated meat...i mean MEAT. There was meat of all kinds being prepared all day and everyone wanted me to try theirs. It was good, but that was enough meat for me for some time.
This past week I have had some good times and great conversations with the children in the community where I stay. I love that they all come running every time that they see me come and go and that they enjoy coming into the compound and playing with me.
I have not spent much time in Kisenyi recently. I hope to be able to get back there this week. The friends that do the children's program on Saturdays has been struggling to raise the funds to pay of the debt to the playground where they have their weekly meetings.
In other news, the mouse that has been tormenting me in my room for the past week is longer there as of this afternoon!! This stupid (very) little guy was good at hiding. I mean my bedroom has a bed and my three suitcases. Not a lot of places to hide. But he managed. Last night was it for me. I got so tired of the guys saying 'tomorrow, tomorrow'. So I had Ben come back to my room with me and try to murder the thing before bed...with no luck. We even carried suitcases outside and emptied them (this was around midnight). Nothing!! Until I lay down and then he scurries all around and up the headboard. So today I was getting lunch out of the food suitcase when guess who popped his head out. I shut it quick and yelled for Collins, a friend of the guys who was over at the time, and he admitted that he was scared of mice himself. haha! I closed that suitcase and took it outside and poked around until that booger finally POPPED out. I screamed, Collins laughed and what a glorious celebration it was.

Mama, do you love me?

Hmmm. What to say? Days here have become life. Never anything new and exciting, just the day to day business of life. Last week I spent the day on the set of a music video (I'll have to let you know if I made the final cut). I had a day of great conversations with some young adult guys in Kisenyi. It started by them asking if I wanted to smoke some ganja or cigarettes with them. To which I always respond, "I value my life and breathing too much." Some of them became curious if I really believed that smoking ganja would kill them. I responded, "slowly , but surely." One became very concerned saying that he looks after several young children and does not want to kill himself. We had a great chat about the reason that he smokes is because of the troubles that he went through as a child. When he's idle he has vivid images flashing through his mind of the trauma that he has been through and smoking helps him forget for the time being. Another man, Papa, interrupted, he's madly in love with me...love at first sight WHITE for him. He tells me that he smokes 45 joints a day and the only way that he would stop is if I promised him my love. REAL love. Sex and kissing. "Mama, I love you" over and over. Poor papa. All that I could do (and everyone else present) was laugh hysterically, but he was serious and getting quite upset. Mzungus have such an easy life. I have never had difficulties in life. I must be rich if I could afford a plane ticket to Uganda.
Some people here don't want to hear it. I am not saying by any means that his life is easy. But maybe if he wasn't sitting around idle with the guys all day every day smoking ganja, he could make something of it. He told me he started smoking because of hunger pains at around the age of 12. As a street child, no one ever offered him food. He said he wanted to know how he could quit. I suggested cutting back to 35 joints a day and using the money saved to buy a hot meal for a street child every day. So that he could help someone out of the cycle as he helps himself. To which he responded that I don't live a hard life. everything that I ever had was handed to me. "Mama, do you love me?" Ummm...No!

Greetings friends and family! I am sure that you have been missing me because I have been missing you! It's hard to find time to get to the internet cafe these days. Mostly cause when I am seriously bored that means the power is out which also means no internet. Anyways, life here is fantastic. Time is going soo fast. I can hardly believe that I've been here for 4 months. I have become really good at enjoying my alone time. I feel that is using the times to help me grow. I know that by being forced to travel teh city alone, eating alone, and being home alone has made me become more independent. I am really enjoying the new me.
On Saturday mornings I have been volunteering with friends of mine and their NGO Youth with a Vision (Sound like something you've heard before?!) They reach out to the street children in the slums and have recently been asked to work with the community children as well. It excites me to see their project grow. Saturdays they share the word and a meal with the boys and then they all play football. They have a new clubhouse where they are able to teach the kids craft and where they house a few boys. These boys can bring the biggest smile to my face.
This particular week the ice cream man was around and a few of the children got some ice cream. One kids fell right off his cone and he through the cone down too and jumped up and down and yelled -If only I understood Luganda- but he was MAD! Another kid came by and picked up the cone and scooped up the ice cream not physically touching the ground an enjoyed. Another boy came along bent down on all fours and licked the ice cream off of the ground turned and saw me and wiped his mouth have with his shirt and quickly got up and came over to give me the biggest hug. As he did, he whispered in my ear, "It's been so long since I have tasted ice cream." He had the biggest grin on his face!!
THis past week I was taken to the part of the slums where these street children stay. My friends escorted me after lunch. I was speechless and quite frankly uncomfortable. The boys were all sniffing as I was informed that they would be. They each have a ball of paper or a piece of a plastic bag with a smell similar to petrol. The smell itself was overwhelming, let alone the sight of 50-60 street kids high. To be honest I was ready to leave at first sight. The pain that I was feeling was so much. Everyone was running towards me "MZUNGU!!" giving me hugs, informing me that they are hungry, need a roof over their head, and wanted an education more than anything. One boy-about 10 years old- clearly hungry, came to me and offered me half of his samosa and insisted that I eat it. It didnt matter how many times I said no...I was going to have to eat it! A girl about 14 years old wanted me to take her young baby and raise it. It's not the first time that I have been asked to do this, but every time it is still just as shocking.
Did I mention that it was pouring all afternoon and I was freezing cold being in my friends room.?! The children were starting fires to keep warm as they wore rags and many of them did not have a pair of shoes to put on their feet.
God has called me to love these children. I know that they are a big part of why I am here. Please pray that I learn how I can best help these kids. If you are interested in helping in any way let me know.

The business meeting...

So many things to share and yet I'd have to write a novel to share it all. I had an entire entry written up last week to share here, but so much has happened since then. So just to catch everyone up on my life here (those of you not on facebook...that's you Willow Valley folks!!) Julia had to fly home last Tuesday morning for surgery. She has been having horrible cramps/pains and finally got the diagnosis that she had to have her gall bladder removed. So now it's just me. I am sure that there are going to be moments when it takes all that I have not to go to the internet cafe to look up plane tickets to come home, but for now I am fine.
So tuesday through Fridaay I lived the village life with my friend James. His aunt died from cancer (please pray for the 2 young children that she left behind.) and James' sister and her husband traveled to the burial. So James and I stayed at their place to care for their children. It was a great few days and it definitely kept me busy. One day while 2 of the kids were at school James and I watched Crash followed by Drop Dead Gorgeous. His choices. Could the day have gotten any better?!
On Saturday morning I ran around Ntinda town in the pouring down rain trying to find an atm that would spit some money out at me. Good times... That afternoon I had thoughts about what am I really doing here. Sometimes I feel like I am just here living my life, hanging out. That was not MY plan. That morning I was supposed to go tot the slums of Kisenyi and do a children's program, but it was canceled due to the rain. It seems that everything I get excited about with kids something happens that I can't go. Anyways, James asked me if I wanted to go to a business meeting with him that evening. Originally when he asked I left it up in the air if I was going. But when the time came to go the power at home was out and I would have been home alone. (nothing like going to bed at 7 when it gets dark!). So I opted to go the business meeting. It started out as a typical evening (for Uganda) waiting an hour for the business man to arrive (we were an hour late ourselves). James' uncle introduced James to this business guy. The business man's wife stays in Kabale, where James' family stays.  Then he wasn't satisfied with the place we chose so we boarded a taxi and went 5 minutes down the street (apparently the 'rich' here can't walk!) We went to some nice hotel, ordered dinner, but then the man got pissed cause the prices in the menu changed (typical in Uganda) and they did not have fish and chips on the menu. they were both sold ala carte but of course he wanted on one plate and he should not have to pay for two ala carte things cause the price includes 2 plates to clean, more service, etc. Hilarious!! So we left there too. We found some random young adult guy on the road just chatting with his friends and the business guy asked him where a place to eat was. This young man showed us the way and then was invited to join us. So we all began chatting. The business man shared that he pays many kids school fees and offered this young guy the opportunity to go back and finish school.  The business man paid and then told us that we were all going back to his house. When we arrived we all sat in the living room watching music videos on tv (i wish you could all experience this...Uganda music videos). The man called James out to another room leaving me and the young adult guy in the room. The business man was apparently making beds cause we were all now spending the night. I thought this was weird, but I am in Uganda. Well James came out with a look on his face of fear and told me to pretend I was on the phone and to tell the business man that I had to go that a friend had an emergency. The tone in his voice was one of those where you don't ask questions and just obey. Thoughts were running through my mind...what happened back there?! I assumed this guy wanted to sleep with me and offered James money to do so. I was freaked out!! So both the guys escorted James and I out. It took a long time to get bodas and probably felt longer cause I had no idea what was going on. When we got on the boda james was talking to the driver. He was getting all emotional. I had no idea what he was saying. Finally he told me. The 'business' man was gay. He apparently was trying to get all over James and kissed him.
James was so upset, obviously. He couldn't stop thanking me for coming along and saving him. I have not stopped praying for the young man. I wonder if the business man pays school fees in exchange for sex. James has been talking to everyone to find a way to stop this guy. Please pray that we are able to stop him in a manner that is safe for us and everyone involved. Once again, not MY program and not a normal story. But it happened here in Uganda.

Greetings from Uganda!!! Just wanted to say hello to everyone since it's been some time. Our internet stick is no longer working and so we are back to internet cafes. I have nothing prepared to write here today and only a short time left so this will be nothing special. Things have been going really well here. We've been super busy this week. Last weekend we were at FDLM in Jinja. (Have I told you lately how awesome those kids are!!) Every minute there was amazing and I was not ready to leave. We traveled home on Monday and spent the evening at home relaxing. On Tuesday I spent the day in Kisenyi with friends and all the cute kids. Of course I got some of the world's best orange juice and the best matoke, rice and gnut sauce in town. Delicious! Yesterday I spent the day at Bula.. The primary kids were able to go to school yesterday (1.5 weeks late-they are able to begin school without paying their fees). The secondary kids are still waiting for their school fees. Pray that the school fees will come in soon. They have been really down and out and can not wait to get back to school. I will definitely miss them when they are gone. There were a lot of good, deep chats yesterday as it was just them and I at the home for most of the afternoon. When the primary kids got home from school we began making chapati and rolex for dinner. This process took till about 11:30pm. It was a late dinner and an even later boda ride home. 

From Boring to Exciting

Yesterday started out as any other boring Saturday does.  At breakfast Julia was asking if I would go to Game (a walmart-ish store) with her as she has never been and wanted out of the house. I told her that I wanted to clean the room and get packed for Jinja first and then we would see what time it was. (Breakfast here is typically at 11-noon).  I went back to the room and started packing some clothes. I realized that there must have been more dirty clothes than I realized. So I grabbed a few dirty shirts and washed them in the bathroom. Since I was in the groove I washed some more and then some more. I took them outside to hang up on the line and after putting a few shirts up I realized it was breezier than I thought. So I called to Julia to pass me the clothespins that I had brought. (I had yet to use these so I was VERY excited about this). Now the wash lines are over the compost pile and there is high weeds all around. So it took me some time to maneuver around. Well about halfway through I felt something under me give way and before I knew it my feet were wet and then my calves.  I didn’t even think about what I had just fallen into- all that I knew is my flip flop was coming off and I wanted it and my legs to come out of the hole. Upon climbing out I immediately smelt the odor- sewer!! I began walking towards the house wondering how I was going to get by the two girls who were visiting and back to the bedroom to wash off and give Julia a good laugh. Then I realized that my right arm was kind of numb and I did not like bending it. I looked at my elbow and it looked different. I called out to Julia and then the pain started.  I quickly got into the tub and she splashed me with bottled water to get the nastiness off of me and then she helped me change my pants.  We called Ronnie to come with the car and within minutes we were off to the hospital.

                Every bump I felt this pain that was almost unbearable. Along the way Julia reaffirmed me that she had brought food  cause she didn’t know how long we would be at the hospital. I asked what she had and she states, “Swedish fish and biscuits (cookies)”. LOL! Upon arrival to the hospital Julia helped me fill out some basic paperwork and then I was taken to a bed where I was given “painkillers”. They had no water so good thing Julia had some in her bag. Julia was all concerned that I needed to eat something so that the painkiller on an empty stomach would not make me sick. I reassured her that I was still full from breakfast.

                Within minutes I was sent to get xrays. I waited for little time when my doctor came and gave me some paperwork and the bill and said I had to go pay for the xrays before I had them done.  We explained to the men at the desk that I had insurance and they said I had to pay in cash and then my insurance company would reimburse me. Good thing I went to the back just a day or two before! I got the xrays and then back to my bed with the results I was sent. The nurse came and rubbed bengay on my arm and put me in a splint (think guaze). I was informed that it was a sprain and to keep something cold on it to reduce the swelling –(This is Uganda-I don ‘t think ice packs exist!) I have to return Tuesday morning to see a specialist. We were handed the bill and sent to the pharmacy to pick up some meds. Upon reading the bill it was determined that the “painkillers” given to me upon arrival was ibuprofen. LOL!

                We left jumped on some bodas and were off to a really good Ethiopian restaurant that we found a month before (Thanks Melissa for the suggestion). We had goat and then we ordered a cheap garden salad ($1.25) just cause I have had a salad craving since I got to this country. It was huge and amazing!! It had rained during our meal and so we waited to get some bodas home. We fought for a fair price, but never got it. Good thing- cause it started raining again. We stood around and then went into a cheap supermarket to look for a cheap plastic bag to put the xrays in so they would not get wet. Inside we found so many deals. Pasta cheaper than we get at our local supermarket, alfredo sauce (about to expire) cheap, peanut butter and then we found the dvds and there was LOST!! We purchased season 1 for a mere $1.50 and if it works well. Season 6 and Part 1 and 2 of the final season are awaiting my return.

                As I type this my elbow feels so much better. I don’t really know what pain meds they have me on. But I can feel my fingers again and the swelling in my hand has gone down. Now the elbow feels severely black and blue and it is swollen still. But the fact that I can bend it and move it around it is progress enough.

I love my life!!

Making Memories. Lives Changed.

Here I am sitting in Uganda, Africa. I feel that I am home.  I can truly say that at this point. Sure I miss America. Mostly I miss the people involved in my life there. Sometimes (okay…quite often) I dream of one of my mom’s home cooked meals. I miss receiving a weekly paycheck so that I don’t have to feel guilty about spending money.  But what I miss most is the moments that I am missing. The memories that never were and never will be because I am not there. Such as RCM 2011, hurricanes at the beach, my best friend Madeleine growing up, game nights, family trips to the cabin, and so much more. When Ugandan  friends ask me what I am thinking about (which is all the time) it is typically this. It is how different my life would be right now if I were not here. BUT I am here. I am enjoying a world of moments that so many will never take the opportunity to make. I am making friends that I know will last a lifetime. Through God in my life I am impacting the lives of many as they impact mine.

I sit here alone in my room watching the storm outside my window listening to worship music and reflecting.  These (almost) three months have changed me. I feel like I am a stronger person. A person willing and able to stand up for what I believe is right. A person who understands more and more how much culture impacts who you are and how experiencing another can make you stop and think about what you have thought all your life is right because of what your culture tells you is right. And then when you are in another who thinks differently…are you wrong? Or are they? OR are you both wrong?

I often reflect on ‘why am I here?’ Am I really doing anything? Am I making a difference? Is this all worth my time and your money? I still have a peace that I am where God wants me to be. I don’t want to doubt him anymore. I want faith that can move the mountains. Maybe I am not here to move mountains, but overcome a lot of hills. These past few weeks there have been a lot of these ‘hills’. It’s been challenging not having that ONE organization to fit with here anymore and instead going here and there every day.

*it was a blessing to be here when my friend Ronald died. It was good to be able to be with his family on that day. It was great to have been able to see him once again this year. Sure I wish I would have taken the time out of my “busy life” to hang out with him when he called wanting to be the first friend to come visit me in Namirembe.

* Then it was clearly a God moment that I was here to pay Abbey’s medical bill. His family and friends were wailing , watching the one that they love slowly die. I mean that’s what was happening. He was sitting in a clinic, internally bleeding not wanting to “bother” me.  I am grateful that he is still around to hang out with. I know that I hold tightly onto money and it was a growing experience for me to let go.

*Then the other night when I arrived home at dark, I was locked out. Five of the kids that live in the house across the street came over and asked if they could hang out with me because they were scared. They were home alone with a teenage cousin who was abusing them and trying to scare them. W e hung out and I learned about who they were and we had some good laughs. Even after Julia arrived home I stayed out with them into their mom got home from the salon.

*Yesterday I went back to the house that I stayed in my first time to Uganda. I was able to spend some quality time with the now youth that I lived with. It was great to catch up on life with them. When we were headed to town 2 others who stay there were also going. We joined and went together. I asked them to join us for lunch. We all had chips and chicken with a Mirinda Fruity. The bill came to about $10 for the four of us. They were sooo thankful. It’s the simple things.

My prayer today is that I continue to walk where He leads me. That I will be willing to answer to His calling. I have not written this so cry out ‘why am I here?’ I LOVE it here. I am glad that I am here. I want others to be able to experience this with me. That is why many of you I always ask when are you coming. I am so glad that Julia is able to experience this with me. It’s always easier when you have a friend by your side. 

My "Vacation" in pictures

Kampala!!

On our way to Rwanda to renew our visas we stopped at Ronnie's Jaja (grandmothers). This is the view.

 More of the view!

 Food at Jaja's!! This was just a welcome home plate. Not dinner!!

 We made banana pancakes with everyone!

 JAJA!! Ronnie, Julia, Jaja, me, James

Climbing the rocks at Jaja's.

 Lake Bunyonyi- James and I

 LOL!!

Lake Bunyonyi

What price do you put on a friend's life?

Well it’s been some time since I have updated on my life here. It continues to be crazy but good!  So at the funeral of my friend Ronald, another friend Abbey fell and cracked some ribs and damaged his spleen. He sat in a clinic in the slums of Kisenyi for several days internally bleeding. He of course was not answering my phone calls wondering if he had wanted to hang out (I did not know that he was in the clinic). Finally on Monday a mutual friend picked my call and informed me that Abbey was impending surgery the following day. The next day I went to the clinic and spoke to the doctor of his condition. He recommended that I take him for a second ultrasound before we make any decisions. So we piled into a car and spent a long afternoon waiting for him to be taken back. (You see here in Uganda if you give a small bribe things move along quicker for you.) I however am not willing to play the game. That evening we went back to the clinic and showed the results to the doctor. He said that Abbey needed surgery asap. We asked that he be admitted to the hospital that evening and the doctor would not agree. He kept repeating let him spend the night here. We began calling surgeons all over Kampala and hospitals to make sure there was a bed. It was decided that he would have surgery the following day or the day after. (Don’t forget this man is internally bleeding.) I was sent home with all the ultrasound pics ready to go to the hospital the following day. Late that night I got a phone call from the clinic doctor saying that Abbey was admitted to the hospital and the surgeon needed to see all the ultrasounds. I rushed them immediately to the hospital. When I arrived it was already decided that Abbey would be having surgery that night-it was an emergency. NO DUH!! I wish that you could all see the hospital, and it was apparently a nice one. Abbey was going into shock and they were letting him fall asleep on the bed. Then they told him to call his family to have someone be there when he awakes. I went home and prayed like I had never prayed before. I was not able to sleep a wink until the surgeon and doctor called me and verified that Abbey made it through the surgery.

Going into the hospital that week to visit was always an adventure. Some days there was blood all over the floor, other days there was a man with 2 broken arms trying to escape, and there was always people crying and screaming for help.  One evening when Abbey was in a lot of pain his family called and asked me to come in. Upon arrival I discovered that there was only 1 nurse on the entire ward and no doctors. What was the purpose of being in the hospital?!

Abbey is now doing well. They were able to repair his spleen and not remove it. He had his stitches removed and is able to eat more and more every day. I keep being asked how I spent the money or be  careful and don’t get too involved. Is $375 too much to save a great friend’s life?! I don’t think I would be able to live with myself today had I thought about another day or had him try harder to find the money. What would you do?

Did I mention that I was in the Uganda newspaper today?! Picture and all! The entire article may be false or should I say the truth was stretched. 

Some people that I am thankful for...

1. Julia Adams: She has been by my side through everything. Willing to go to friend's viewings and spend a day making sure that a friend gets the lifesaving surgery that he needs. We are able to laugh and cry together. I can honestly say these 10 weeks have been life changing for me and she has played a major part in them. Thank you Julia.

2. My Parents and brothers: Who I know love me and worry about me, but are always there supporting me every step of the way.Phone calls at random times of the day saying call me back please and they always do or simple fb messages and chats that can brighten up my day. Love you!!

3.Pastor David Zijjan: The founder of the FDLM orphanage in Jinja that Bridge Connections is blessed to work with. He is always a phone call away willing to lend any assistance that we need. One day there were lots of Police and not a lot of people in Kampala city and we called David in Jinja to find out what was going on. He says,"You are in Kampala and I am in Jinja and you want me to tell you what is going on in Kampala?!" Haha! A few minutes later he had an answer for us. Phone calls saying I was thinking about you girls today so I called is just what we need some days. Thanks David for all the support and all the cultural understanding lessons that you give. I can't wait to come visit in the coming weeks!! Love you.

4. Nathan and Katie Kilgore: I know that you 2 are always praying. The advice and the experience that you have is priceless. Thank you for Bridge Connections and working with us on this journey. I don't know what I would do without you. (Well I probably wouldn't be in Uganda.) Thank you so much!

5. Megan Rohrer and Kelly McGaw: I don't even have words to describe how thankful I am for your friendship. When I look at the pics that I brought and share them I laugh cause it's hard to explain the bondage I feel with the McGaw family and that's why many of the pics I brought were of you. I love you and miss 'us' so much. Thank you for calling me to chat. (Kelly-I know God laid it on your heart to call me last night as I needed it the most. I am so glad that I have a friend like you who understands and cares. When I describe you I say that you are any man's dream girl, the best friend anyone can ask for. The person who would drop anything for anyone. I don't know anyone with as big as a heart as you.) And then (Megan: There is this beautiful card that you wrote me Valentine's Day that I keep in my Bible and read once a week (at least). It brings a smile to my face and tears to my eyes as I realize how grateful I am to be able to call you my  friend. I miss Friday and Saturday evenings chilling at your house with you and your girls.) Thank you girls for the friendship over the years. I love you!!

6.J ames and Ronald (and the rest of the crew): James begged me on several occasions to allow him to take us out sometime. Unfortunately his schedule did not match ours. Finally on a Tuesday it did and these guys took us all over and we ended up at the beach for a great evening. They let us know that if we ever needed an escape that we could come to their place anytime. Little did they know the next day we called and we were moved in the following. They took time out of their schedule to come and pick us up and make sure that we were always comfortable here. It's great to have them around to chat to.

7. Joe and Sue McDonald, Judy Hinson, and Judy Kauffman: There is always an inbox in my email from these people. I am so lucky to have you all in my life. Thanks for your encouraging words and allowing me to continue living Willow Valley through you.

8. All of you praying for me: I can't do what I am doing without people like you. I know that you are out there and it keeps me going. I can honestly say that I know that God has been with me through this past week as I know that I could not have done it alone. A special thanks to Shari Steager and Daryl Rineer as your kind words were just what I needed to read when I did.

I believe today is a new week and things are looking up. To update those of you not on Facebook. My good friend Abbey fell Saturday at the funeral of our friend and ruptured his spleen. He stayed at a clinic, internally bleeding until last night. I was in touch with him on Sunday evening when he informed me of what was going on. Monday I spent the day taking him to get an ultrasound and talking to the doctors. That evening (only by the grace of God) he was admitted to the hospital and ended up having emergency surgery last night. As I stood by his bed holding his shaking hand all I could do was pray.  I got a call from the doctor that he made it through and will be going in soon to make certain all is well. I will update you in the coming days of the decisions that Julia and I have made about where and how we plan on serving and being served here in Uganda. For now pray for Abbey that he heals well. Pray for Ronald's family as they are missing him. And pray for the meeting that will happen between myself, julia, and the uncles at Bula.

Did THAT just happen??!

It’s so hard to write this and I have been putting it off because I want to pretend like it never happened. But these last several days did happen, they were challenging, full of tears and laughs, and will always be remembered.

So let’s start with Monday.  On Monday evening we had a discussion with the uncles about the children being disrespectful towards Julia and I. Two new volunteers arrived on Sunday morning and the children were blaming us for taking them to town on Monday to exchange money. They repeatedly told me that I was telling the new volunteers to not give them anything and keep things in the room, etc. Anyways, during the meeting we decided that it would be best to have a family meeting that night and discuss it. I was afraid that the children would not open up, but OH was I wrong. We heard everything from “they don’t wash their hands before they give us toothpaste.” To “They are the reason our language is bad cause they showed us the movie Hitch which (apparently) has bad language and kissing scenes.” To “they are the worst volunteers that we have ever had.” So the meeting did not really make me feel better…but at least I got some answers.

Wednesday was the next meeting. It was to be a new volunteer orientation. So the 4 of us volunteers were there and the 3 uncles. This meeting ended in the head uncle getting extremely heated, agitated, and his voice was raised. The main concern that was brought up was Julia and I wanting to take the children out of the house for a simple, chap dinner with 1 or a few children at a time. This was to be a special day for the child that would be fun, provide a way to give that child our full attention, to show them the culture around them, and for us to get to know them on a different level. Well long story short we are not allowed to do that because “What if we would have had those children out at the restaurant where the bombings were last year?! We are accountable for each of the children.” The meeting ended by my leaving the office in tears when the head uncle said’ “Jolene and Julia why don’t you take your money and spend it at another orphanage!” Minutes later the other three came to the room where we were crying wondering what just happened. The head uncle knocked on our door and asked me to come out in the hall where he proceeded to hand me the rent money that Julia and I paid that morning. WHAT!!? At this point numerous phone calls were made to friends in Uganda and to our parents. We decided that we should pack our bags and move out of the home temporarily.

Thursday afternoon our friends arrived with their car and took us to their house where we would be staying. That morning the secondary students arrived home from boarding school excited to see us and exclaiming how much fun we were going to have over holiday. Of course we had to share that we were leaving for a few days to sort things out. That morning I also received a phone call from a friend’s sister who was in shock saying that my friend (her brother, Ronald) had passed away that morning and that I had to come to their home in Kisenyi immediately. So after many questions about death in Uganda and how the grieving process worked I decided that I did in fact have to go to the family’s home that day. So Julia and I dropped our bags in our new room, grabbed a cheap lunch at a local joint and then headed out.  I walked in to an outside room of mourners. The boys father greeted me whispering with tears coming to his eyes,”Your friend is no longer among us. He has died.” We sat down in chairs was told that food that Ronald ate was poisoned and he was very sick for 3 days. The doctors did all that they could. And then came the words, ‘Do you want to go see the body?” We followed him up the stairs to the home. People were crying all around. Halfway up my eyes locked with a sisters and she ran to me “Jolene!, He’s dead! Ronald’s dead! I call out to him, but he doesn’t hear me!” Into the house I walked not knowing what lied ahead with the arms of two women wrapped around me, heads on my shoulders, wailing. The room was full of women crying and the casket in the middle of the room. We probably stood there for 3 minutes, but it felt like forever! We went back outside to sit and reflect.

Friday we visited a friend’s school where he teaches at. They had a special day where the children presented to family what they learned that year. Came back home around 5 and hung out at the house for the evening. Around 11 Julia fell asleep on the couch. James told me to wake her and tell her to go to bed. I did but she refused at first. So James brought the candle (did I mention there is never electricity here) back to the room and set on some speakers beside the bed. The 3 of us joked for a few minutes and then James and I left the room to allow Julia to sleep.  About 2 hours later one of the guys said “there looks like fire” and he walked to the door and looked out. He saw a reflection in the car parked right outside our bedroom window. Seconds later 2 guys were running down the hall to my bedroom. Julia was awaken and she came out through billowing smoke and laid on the couch again to fall right back to sleep after telling me that it was a legit fire. We slept on a mattress in the living room that night.

The next morning the guys immediately began scrubbing down our entire room. Luckily we had not unpacked much of our stuff so it was safe inside our suitcases.  It was later confirmed that my laundry bag had caught fire and I lost several shirts and pants. Some were saved with minor damage that may get cleaned enough (fingers crossed).

The challenge of whether to go back or not continues. I shall keep you updated with what happens in the coming days… Otherwise continue to pray for us and Ronald's family. I am honestly safe and doing well. I know that I am facing these challenges for a reason and I am excited to see what happens this coming week.

Pictures!!

 me and some of the girls

Bujagali Falls-The Nile

Vincent

The boys running away from the photo

Sports Day! The marching practice paid off!

Bula Children's Home-Where I live!!

Sarah, Brenda, Lillian, Sharon, Arnold, and Apizu in the back

Only in Uganda...

Let me tell you about my day yesterday...So Julia and I were to meet with a friend at 11. We jumped on bodas (motorbikes) and told our drivers where we wanted to go. We verified that they knew where we were talking about. We were off... Julia's driver fell behind and so my driver pulled over. Of course it was by a man preaching who quickly changed from Luganda to English. "All woman who consume alcohol are prostitutes!" Cute!! We enjoyed lunch and said good bye to Melissa. We jumped on another boda off to the Office of Internal Affairs to work out extending our visas. We told them close to Centenery Park they verified they knew. We drove by the park. I asked my driver if he knew where he was going and explained that I would not pay more for him being lost. They dropped us at an offfice for internal affairs for PRISON. So Julia and I walked. We arrived at the office after asking 10 people where to go and of course it was lunch break! The lady handed us a list of things we would need ...Criminal background check, resume, letters from the organization we were working with, $250..... She told us we were currently in the country illegally on the wrong visa. We quickly grabbed our passports and were out the door. I called the US Embassy to find out about the Criminal Background check. I could make an appt and come in with $50 and a letter that I write about my good standings back home that they would notarize and then somehow get the FBI to fingerprint me, yada, yada....Then she said that it could take 1 month to 1 year to process if it ever gets done! CUTE!! She then added that plenty of people's passports get lost in the process. So we will be leaving the country of Uganda for a day or 2 and then re-enter on another 90 day visa. We are thinking Rwanda...